2

THE KRONIKLS OF DESMONDE

CHAPITRE 2.

AND it came to passe, that, in tyme, Desmounde did becoume profiscient in the wayes of warre, and he wore a loinclothe which surrounded his genitalia, and also, a cuppe which shielded it, and he carried a speare, and thusly did he walke about towne. And in the towne hee did see manie thynges, and they impress'd himme, such that his genitalia did engourge, and swelle, and it press'd up against the cuppe which shield'd itte, and it was mouste uncounfortable, and he thought to him selfe, that it was indeed two sydes to every thynge in this Worlde, that was the cuppe which protecteth, it also paineth himme, in tymes of great greavance.

Thusly, he did go unto the local escole, to be escoled, by the professeur, for it was decre'd that the souldiers of the provynce must be skill'd in the readinge, and the wrigting, and also the aritihmetick, such that they may decribe the figures of the warre tyme, and to prepare and interepret the repourts which were deliver'd to theme, and the addresse the generalle corectlie. And Desmonde came unto the class-roome, and he sat himself unto a chaire, and he empty'd his bouels, and he did absourbe infourmatione.

However, in the tyme, there was a great greavance, upon the cuppe which protecteth his genitalia, such that he did becoume quite uncounfortable, and he poundered as to the source of this misfourtoune, and he realised that he had seene a woumoun, upon the row in his fournt, and he thought to himself, that he would like to coupulate with this woumon, and then he comtemplaet'd, and he discover'd that this was the source of the greavance, which caused the cuppe to become tighte, and uncounfortable. And then he went back to his houme and comtemplated how he could copulate with the woumon, such that the greavance would not occur againe, and as such disrupte his learninge.